Monday, February 14, 2011


Sometimes my callers want to give me gifts. Lately, I've gotten an unusually high amount of them.

Since I have a cam now, I made little videos of myself opening everything I've gotten in the past week. I figure it's good advertisement for my new cam listing too, right? I mean, just making a bunch of videos of myself isn't completely narcissistic, is it?

(Dear Inner Modest and Shy Girl: Please try to just keep your eyes closed more. All I can really offer you is denial. Sorry. Love, Galiana)

First: a thank you to the financial slave who bought me the camera, some Secrets In Lace lingerie, some amazing Carlos shoes, stuff to set up the Fuckatorium for cam, a new headset for cam calls, and some new hair / face stuff that I'm loving using. Here's me opening some of that (I didn't realize when I made it that Blogger would squish widescreen... sorry):

Then today, for Valentine's Day, I made 3 videos. The first was lingerie and pillowcases, and the chocolates my husband got me:

The second is 2 gifts I got in the mail, both of which make me feel good in different ways: the ItGetsBetter t-shirt, and a SpaFinder gift certificate.

And the last Valentine's Day gift-o-rama is a veritable boatload of stuff that will let me dress up and look a bit like a robot! I have a few fans in the technosexual / fembot fetish community who want me on video or cam. I'm still working on my movements, and not ready to demo those yet, but now I have clothes! /squee

I look happy in all these videos, and grateful, and both of things are true: I am both happy and grateful for them. And at the same time, I'm a tiny bit overwhelmed.

Remember at the end of A Streetcar Named Desire when Blanche tells the man who's coming to take her away that she has "always relied on the kindness of strangers"? I haven't. Not a bit. I've always relied on myself, always had a hard time asking for help, and always been stubbornly insistent on valuing *people* over *things*. I gave gifts much more freely and graciously than I accepted them.

And now I find myself in the position of completely relying on the kindness of strangers, and having to figure out how to be gracious about accepting things which will enhance my life, or help me grow my business. It's easiest if I can point to some way where "he'll get his money's worth out of this", but when someone gives me SpaFinder gift certificates so I can get a massage... well... there's not a lot there except for me to relax and enjoy myself, is there?

I'm working on it. I'm better. I'm down to only about 20% of the time now where I think "What the hell am I doing? What they hell are they doing? What the hell should I do when they wake up and regret this?!?" That's an improvement - at first it was more like 80%...

This is good for me. It's good for me to stretch and grow and learn how to do new things, like enjoy getting gifts without feeling guilty or indebted.

Thank you, gentlemen who have been getting me gifts. Thank you very much for the gifts, and thank you very much for helping me grow. /blowkiss


  1. You look SO CUTE in your vids!


  2. DITTO to that! you look just adorable and the second outfit is just so schoolgirl/office slut-esque!

    <3 Babybeast

  3. BB darling, thank you very much!!