Wednesday, February 2, 2011

Mistaken Identities

Public Service Announcement (PSA) from your friendly neighborhood Phone Sex Operator (PSO):

Please keep in mind that your PSO is not told your identity / user name when you call, and cannot look it up until the call has been connected for at least a few seconds, and then only if she is at her computer and logged in to the right page, which is not always the case.

"Mistaken Identity" mishaps can possibly occur.

For example, if yesterday's call to the new Role Playing listing involved me being transformed from a physiologically normal human woman into a freakish sexbot with a 12-inch cock, testicles the size of grapefruit, and breasts the size of basketballs... then today when you call the same listing and tell me you're the robot guy but you didn't expect to be able to call again so soon, I may not immediately remember that a few days ago, you and I enjoyed a leisurely transformation fantasy where I wrapped you in a nanotech bodysuit and seduced you into joining me in  post-human bliss. I may get confused and spend the first few minutes spouting phrases which would seem illogically inconsistent with our experiences together thus far.

Or if you have a delicious, sweet, gentle voice and identify yourself by only your first name, I may forget the luscious, slow, playful masturbation I guided you through last week, which caused me to record the note "happiest friendliest teasing masturbation ever", and may instead assume you are a frequent cross-dressing caller by the same name who considers herself a lesbian, but likes taking my strap-on. I could possibly then bafflingly ask you what you're wearing and refer to your genitalia by gender-switched pronouns.

I mean... of course those didn't both happen to me today. Back-to-back. That would just be horrible and unprofessional and mortifying. Don't be ridiculous. Of course not.


But to be on the safe side, to ensure that I will not involve you in someone else's fantasies and send you someone else's energy... please feel free to identify yourself by your user name as well as your first name, since the user name is unique in the system, and that's what I track on my spreadsheets for calls and feedback. Because "IHaveAPhoner" or "pkb216" are extraordinarily unlikely to confuse me. Or, equally effectively, you may work out a simple code name with me like "John in Missoula" or "Two-Hand Pete".

You know, not that it's a problem or anything, but it may work to your advantage if I were inexplicably confused one day...

(side note: I don't have callers with any of those names, but I'm irrationally amused by, and therefore proud of, "IHaveAPhoner"... Get it? It's like IHaveABoner but for phone sex? /giggle Wow, I'm a dork today)

This concludes our quarterly PSO PSA. Thank you for your attention.

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