The Camera Adds

Back in December 2011, I took one too many anti-vertigo medicines after getting dizzy after shooting a custom video, so I decided it would be a fantastic time to wax philosophical on camera. Most of what I shot that evening was unsuitable for viewing by anyone other than my Recycle Bin, but this one was pretty funny.

I was getting frustrated at how disproportional I looked when I was in any position other than sitting, leaning forward, with my elbows resting on my knees. So I talked about other positions and showed just exactly how unflattering some other angles are.

But there are a couple of nice moments where I hit good angles and I look deliciously curvy instead of freakishly out of proportion. Also, the little grey cami + undies look cute.

Camera Adds by GalianaChance

Today I wanted to test embedding videos that are potentially more risque than YouTube allows, so I posted this one, and now I'm sharing it with you to ask you to be my guinea pigs. Let me know if it doesn't work? Thanks!

Please enjoy me making a dork of myself...

My First YouTube Video: First Thoughts on Control

I just posted my first YouTube video!

The title is "First Thoughts on Control - Recognizing Abuse and Encouraging Negotiation" and it's aimed at people interested in control play in the bedroom. I do not think I have necessarily original thoughts on BDSM subjects, but I believe that every voice helps when it comes to encouraging safety and sanity, even in the context of for-pay BDSM over the phone.

I have more a generic intro "Hello World" video that I should post first, but upon re-watching it, I need to add one significant thought to it before I post it, and I've already stalled on posting these long enough (I recorded it 10 days ago). So I pulled on my big girl panties and pretended like it's okay to do things out of sequence.

(That screaming you hear? Several of my more particular Inner Voices throwing fits about posting things out of sequence...)

If it gets yanked from YouTube for being adult content, that's fine, I'll upload it elsewhere and re-do the link here, but for now, this embedded player should work (fingers crossed...):



If the embedded player doesn't work, here's the link instead: First Thoughts on Control - Recognizing Abuse and Encouraging Negotiation

Although the video does not reflect me in phone-sex / sexy-time mode, it does reflect me being all reflective and thoughtful, so for those of you who get turned on smart thoughts from smart people, you're welcome!

(many thanks to Domme Kyaa for posting her Philosophy of a Fem Domme series, which was the original inspiration for me to do these - I can't find the original links anymore, but the one linked is representative of her work)

Video: Galiana-bot Remote Control

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Stuff to Buy Reorg

I have reorganized my Stuff to Buy page (Stuff to Buy) so now the main page has info about custom pricing, but then splits into three pages to list things for sale: MP3s, Photo Sets, and Videos.

Even though I only have 2 MP3s available at the moment, it still had to be the first page because I needed them to be alphabetical, even though videos sell better for me than photos MP3s. I am slightly annoyed by my own impracticality on that issue...

I'm sure you've noticed the flurry of pay-to-view announcements lately on my blog. The truth is, I had a few things holding me back from producing more content: My "Stuff to Buy" page was a mess and it made me cringe to add things to it, my ordered list of what to do to publish new content was a mess and it made me cringe to follow it, and I had a backlog of stuff I'd already shot that was in various stages of having been produced and it made more sense to me to finish those before I started others.

So I have now finished publishing all the pay-to-views (PTV) that I had started, although I have a few more to announce on the blog (I wanted to intersperse with other types of blog entries as well so the blog isn't solely comprised of pay-to-view announcements). But the hard stuff of editing, listing on NiteFlirt, etc, has been completed.

I swing back and forth: sometimes, I feel like I should just stick with the phones, because it's simpler to get sexy and log in than it is to make content. Then I'll sell some content when I'm away from the phones and feel like I should continue to provide those other revenue streams for myself.

It's all opportunity cost, right? If I spend my energy on my PTV content, I would probably lose my phone sex audience. My phone sex audience likes having stuff to buy, but there aren't enough of them to support making content unless I spend energy promoting my pay-to-view content. It's complicated.

If I were to keep the Fuckatorium in a video-ready state all the time, it would be easier. But I let the dogs play tug-of-war with ropes in there, which fray and leave strings on the carpet. And I have piles of clothes in various levels of put-away-ness (laundry is my nemesis!). And I'm not sure I'm happy with the way the room is arranged for video to start with...

The tortured life of The Girl Who Never Thinks Her Stuff Is Good Enough, right?

Regardless of all my insecure whining, I would appreciate it if you would drop by the rearranged Stuff to Buy pages and tell me if you find them easier to use now. And also, you know, if you want to tell me that seeing all those thumbnails of me drives you complete insane with lust, I'd be up for that, too. Thanks!

Video: Submissive Slut

I'm pleased to announce my bounciest, ditziest, cutest, perkiest video yet: Submissive Slut Awaiting Master's Visit.

It's a custom video, and the instructions were:

* dress as cute as you can get: pigtails, your glasses, and girly lingerie (check)

* act out the scenario of: you're my submissive slut, and you're telling me how much you're looking forward to my visit this coming weekend (check)

* look sweet and innocent, but talk filthy (check)

* if you can gag on a toy or play with your pussy, all the better (oh hell yeah check)

I was kind of hopped up on caffeine and adrenaline when I shot this. I'd been thinking about sexy things all day and changing into a series of sexy outfits, so I was dying to get off. It was super-easy to let my favorite clit-stimulating pink egg vibrator do its thing while my shoving my favorite cock-substitute red vibrator down my throat.

Ahhhhh, it feels so nice to return to the basics, doesn't it?

Although the runtime is only 5:29, I did manage to have a genuine orgasm on video (and momentarily forgot to keep looking at the camera... some day I'll behave like a pro, I'm sure).

I am in constant motion in this video, never a still moment. Although it is more pronounced in the video than in my usual demeanor, this is absolutely an accurate glimpse into how incredibly damn wiggly I am when I'm turned on.

More than one person with the intention of dominating me in a BDSM way has paused to laugh at me and tell me some variation of, "I'm not sure I can beat you because you look so damn happy." This video captures that side of me exceptionally well.

If you wish to purchase it, it is $10 through NiteFlirt: click the Buy Now button and it'll be on its way to you in a jiffy.


Wow, talk about being the exact opposite side of the coin from my last post, isn't it? Fetish for variety indeed!

Video: Paralegal Humiliation and Blackmail

You've been a bad boy, haven't you? First, you took credit for my work on the case, then you lied to me about your marital status, and last, but certainly not least, you are working with a seriously under-equipped little partner there in your pants, aren't you?

Tell you what, you just sit back and enjoy this video conference call where I do a strip tease for you on company time, and I'll make sure and save it with no audio so HR and the senior partners can get a good long look at it, if you don't give me what I'm demanding...

I was in quite a mood when I shot this video, thinking of a caller who is a lawyer (and I used to do litigation support, so the jargon is actually legit), who will likely be both horrified and fascinated by it. The humiliation includes legal incompetence as well as small penis humiliation. I think I had some leftover hostility from my old job!

I know there are more images in the gif than usually available for most clips that only run 6:22, but I had a ton of fun shooting it, and couldn't choose only a few looks.

I think I look kind of adorable in this one, if I do say so myself, but what I'm saying definitely shows that I'm not someone you want on your bad side!

It's available for $7 via NiteFlirt:

Secrets and Exposure

Here's the deal, blog readers, I tell you a lot. I mean, a ton. I tell you so much that some would argue I probably turn some of you off because I spill my guts all the time.

We've grown to trust each other, right? I mean, you get me. You understand my compulsively narcissistic need to have callers whisper in my ear references to my blog posts, don't you? Because that is seriously, blindingly, searingly hot when that happens. The other day... oh, no, wait, stay on topic.

So, um, I... I have a confession to make. I have to keep a secret from you. It's not that I don't trust you, because I totally do. But there are these annoying things called traffic leaks ... If I link to a competing site on this blog, my NiteFlirt listing could get pulled, because I link to the blog from my listing. It makes sense, doesn't it?

So the truth, as much as I can tell you, is: I've been wandering a bit, trying out other spots, uploading pictures and videos to other venues. But in general, other places don't pay as high a percentage as NiteFlirt, they don't pay as often as NiteFlirt, they don't generate the same kind of traffic as NiteFlirt ... so I'm not interested in jeopardizing my NF relationship in any way.

Plus, you're better off calling me and buy my pay-to-view items via NF, anyway, because my rates are higher elsewhere to make up for the hassle of having to keep track of multiple logins. The pattern for taking calls elsewhere seems to be that I try it for a few days, get annoyed again, and go back to only logging in to NF as usual.

So far, it's just been more work, with little additional income, but I'm going to keep at it for a while, and do some follow-up marketing-ish activities, at least with the pay-to-views, in case it brings new exposure. In the meantime, it has the benefit of helping me feel like I'm getting a few long-standing organizational tasks knocked off my to-do list, and that part feels great.

Plus, I've learned the fine art of making animated gifs!

This one is my favorite, the gif for the Galiana-bot Demo 01 (and here's the link to buy it if you're interested and haven't bought it already):

It does a much better job of capturing the best moments of the video than the auto-generated animated gifs. Plus, animated gif "previews" are way way way way way way easier to make than video trailers, but I feel like it's an acceptable enough substitute to be willing to settle for it, so yay.

Oh, dear, I'm sorry... is the flashing images of me unzipping my body suit and grabbing for balance mid-orgasm is distracting for you? /grin (Okay, so, totally, I'm not sorry about that at all)

So that is what I've been up to for a few days' worth of between-call time now: learning how to make animated gifs, setting up storefronts, and uploading stuff. Now you know... mostly. I feel better now that we've cleared the air with that, don't you?

Video(s): Pleasurebot Testing

A gentleman who has seen the Galiana Demo videos (first and second) requested a custom video of the testing done on a Galiana model pleasurebot android before she is shipped to her new owner.

Please note: this version of the Galiana model was ordered especially full-figured, and appears even curvier than earlier demonstration models.

We here at Advanced Smart Fun Robotics (ASFR) take our testing very seriously: we test extensively and thoroughly indeed, which resulted in 25:48 of video. Yep, that's over 25 minutes of fembot testing!

During most of the testing, the unit was naked, which is why we cannot show as many pictures as we normally would to showcase our videos. The one picture shown is from the "Strip Tease" section of testing, when the model was in demonstration human emulation mode. Stripping does, of course, requires clothing to be put ON before it can be taken OFF... although that might have caused a bit of confusion...

All four parts combined are $40 (they are $48 if you purchase them individually, so that is more than a 15% savings!). Link to buy the combination video: http://bit.ly/npzBa4

Each part is $12 if you purchase them separately.

The descriptions below of each part would be considered spoilers if you were considering these a work of fiction, so if you prefer to be surprised by the testing parameters and results, please stop reading now.

Part 1 (07:58): Boot Up, Test Basic Movement, Describe Model Specifications

The naked pleasurebot boots up, stating her manufacturer/series/model/serial number/programming, then begins testing basic movement. After walking, bending, etc have been confirmed to be functioning as expected, she describes the specifications ordered for her particular unit. Link to buy Part 1: http://bit.ly/nTAJ4Y

Part 2 (06:39): Describe Sexual Programming, including explicit close-ups

The naked pleasurebot switches to demonstration human emulation mode to describe in a chirpy, happy, straightforward way all the sexual positions available to someone interacting with a Galiana series fembot: oral, breasts, vaginal, and anal, with explicit closeups, but no penetration (unless you count fingers being stuck down a throat as penetration). Link to buy Part 2: http://bit.ly/o3jOLq

Part 3 (06:59): Testing Strip Tease and Erotic Dancing functionality

The naked pleasurebot tests erotic movement capabilities, including dancing and strip tease... but runs into some issues because stripping requires clothing to have been put on first. This is resolved, and the testing continues. Link to buy Part 3: http://bit.ly/ph6TNc

Part 4 (04:32): Testing Pleasure Processing with dildo, leading to malfunction-via-orgasm

The once-again-naked pleasurebot tests pleasure processing by using a dildo with her vaginal unit, initiating the orgasm sequence, a run of events which reveals a few calibration issues which clearly need to be resolved before the unit can be shipped. The Galiana unit's ending position is clearly not an indication of fembot health. Link to buy Part 4: http://bit.ly/r9R42d

No matter which part(s) you choose, you get both the large (1280 x 720) and small (320x240) resolutions. The format is WMV (please contact Ms Galiana Chance at ASFR Customer Service if you require a different format).

Remember: at ASFR, we have "The Best Human Emulation Mode in the Business!" and "Your Fun Comes First!"

Perfectionism, Insecurity, and Nakedness

This is why I don't do more videos and pictures: perfectionism and insecurity. Well, and the effort.

Logistics first: to get paid for spending an hour on the phone, I need to: (a) feel sexy (b) make sure my dogs are well enough taken care of that if I have to suddenly leave them alone for an hour, they won't starve or dehydrate or chew anything valuable (c) make sure at least one phone has been charged (d) log in (e) wait for an hour's worth of calls.

To get paid for making a video or a picture set or being on cam, I need to: (a) feel sexy (b) shower, do my hair, put on makeup, put on a sexy outfit (c) make sure the lighting and camera and room are set up correctly, including picking up the guts of any toy the dogs have recently shredded (d) try not to lose my sexy while cleaning (e) decide what to say/do (f) make sure dogs... same as above (g) shoot a take (h) watch the take, and about half the time, decide I need to re-shoot it (i) piece all the good takes together into a coherent video with open/close titles (j) upload the video (k) write a blog post / email to announce the creation of the video (l) absolutely die of insecurity until someone tells me it looks great.

In theory, it should take me about an hour to make a 15-minute video. In reality, because I haven't set up a smooth-running content machine yet, and my computer is slow to render, and I can't work on the computer too long at a time without nauseating myself, it takes me a whole day. At least.

Ideally, I'd shoot more than one video in a day, after all that prep, but again, the reality is, once I've done an hour or two of setup and then shot for an hour or two, I need a break, my makeup is getting smudgy, and my creativity is starting to run dry.

All this stems from a video I shot on Sunday, which in theory, I should have released yesterday, but as long as I'm being totally honest and whiny here... deep breath...

I've gained weight since I went on my medicines, and this was a custom video, and he wanted me naked, which I was fine with until about an hour after I shot it, and then all my Inner Cast, all at once, basically started yelling at me, "YOU'RE NAKED ALMOST ALL THE WAY THROUGH THIS ENTIRE VIDEO AND YOU LOOK FAT!"

I know, fuck those voices. I'm trying. I'm doing my best. I actually did just hit send to the person who ordered the custom video, so he has the link.

Now I need to break it up and post it for sale. It's 25 minutes, and it needs to be broken into either two or three shorter videos, because most clips are simply nowhere near that long, so the pricing expectations are geared for shorter videos, so I need to break them up, or else my brain will fucking explode from trying to figure out what to charge.

HOLY FUCKING SHIT, DID I MENTION I'M NAKED IN THIS VIDEO? Like, I have on NO CLOTHES AT ALL. None. Not even earrings. Just inordinate amounts of silver/grey makeup and some pretty awesome silver glittery nail polish.

The nails rock. I'll admit that much. Even though you can't see them for long in the video, they're fucking awesome. Here, I'll distract myself by taking a picture and sharing it with you (which, of course I took 3 times before I just gave up and decided this was good enough, even though my fingers look oddly disproportionate to me, because I'm so fucking neurotic):

I curse a lot when I'm trying to force my way through my insecurities into action. Fuck hell shit damn yeah I do. Oh, and cunt, for good measure.

Well, at least I can still crack myself up. Always. In fact, that is my favorite thing about myself: I can amuse myself endlessly.

Soooo. Back on topic. The poor guy who requested this custom video ... he asked for it almost two months ago, and I said I thought I'd get it to him in a week or two (that was the week before I started taking my new medicines, before everything went haywire for a while). The guy who asked for custom audio asked for it the week before that (I also recorded that on Sunday, two months overdue). Clearly, I have no business making estimates of any kind.

So, if you want a custom video from me, I would be happy to do it, as long as you don't mind waiting approximately forever, and you don't mind if I have a full-fledged insecurity attack before I send it to you. Especially if you want me naked.

Naked. Pudgy. Insecure. Did I mention I was naked? Deep, deep breaths, Galiana. Inhale. Exhale. You'll be fine...

Video: Galiana-bot Monitoring Fembots and Changing Clothes

I shot this custom video back in April, and it has been available on my "Stuff to Buy" page for a while, but I never announced it, silly me.

Watch the trailer!

This video was made from a custom script. In the first half, I am monitoring other fembots and reporting on their progress (so the first 9-ish minutes are close up of my face talking in emotionless mode).

In the second half, I receive new orders to prep for a multi-fembot orgy, so I peel off my jacket and blouse and skirt, revealing a lacy black bra and panties and garter belt and stockings, and then I put on a silver newsboy hat and some silver gloves, and practice my greetings to get ready for the party!

running time: 18:19
resolution: large (1440 x 1080) and small (320x240) are both included
format: WMV (please contact me directly if you require a different format)
price: $15

ASFR Galiana Demo #02

The Advanced Smart Fun Robotics demonstration conference call for the Galiana model android has been rescheduled, because the first one ended so... unexpectedly.

This time, We've added moderators at our remote locations to guard against override codes. What could possibly go wrong?

running time: 16:39
resolution: large (1440 x 1080) and small (320x240) are both included
format: WMV (contact me directly if you require a different format)

cost $20 (but if you purchased the first demo via NiteFlirt, check your NiteFlirt email for a special offer!)

And this time... I made a trailer!

As a side note, I'm pretty sure this series will continue, and I've decided that the tagline "What could possibly go wrong?" is one of the funniest things I've ever written. Hooray for malfunction fetishists...

Android Demo Video

I am sooooo excited to announce my first robot girl video! I have been practicing my robot movement with technosexual callers via cam calls, and they convinced me that I was strong enough to finally release a video.

The storyline is mine, and it's original, but it pulls heavily from the preferences of my callers. I've created a fictional company who manufactures the "Smart Fun Galiana" model of fembot. The company is named Advanced Smart Fun Robotics (ASFR).

(side note: ASFR also stands for alt.sex.fetish.robot, so that's pretty a freakin' awesome name, if I do say so myself... It started off as just SFR, but then I realized that it was close to ASFR, and one of trusted robot cutie fans suggested the "Advanced" /grin)

Anyway, over at Advanced Smart Fun Robotics, it is common for potential customers to request demonstrations via video call. Usually, when a conference call hosts more than one potential customer at a time, a human mediator is present, but none were available for this particular call, and the unit in question was in tip-top shape, so she ran the call on her own.

What could go wrong? Right? 

Common requests include showing more cleavage:

showing all angles:

demonstrating personality:

demonstrating "robot mode":

and... umm.... well, that's unusual for an android to be pulling out vibrators.

But this particular conference call had several specialty customers on the line, and maybe it was a particular... ummm.... request...

Oh dear.


The run time is 15:38, the format is WMV, the price is $20 (contact me to get a conversion to another format if you wish). To purchase the video "Advanced Smart Fun Robotics - Galiana Demo 01" for $20 via NiteFlirt, click here:


I suggest you buy it now, before the management at ASFR sees it and tries to get it out of circulation - the images on this video are bound to be bad for the brand...

Fuckatorium 2.0, Blog Post 300!

I have set up The Fuckatorium enough for me to re-open my cam listing, and this is my 300th Blog Post! (queue streamers, horns, ticker tape, merriment and mirth all around)

On 300 blog posts: Considering I started blogging Aug 15, that's a little better than 40 blog posts per month... which is probably too damn many, but I've learned to accept and (usually) love my chattiness. I am proud of many of the things I've written here, and I have been touched again and again by the responses of people who have found the blog.

On the Fuckatorium and cam: I wanted my 300th post to be special, so I spent the day finalizing my space, and I did a little video tour of the finally-set-up-enough-to-unveil Fuckatorium 2.0! Exciting!

(important note: The sound quality on the video is not as good as the sound when you call me - I promise. But I was tired of mucking with the sound and already 2.5 hours behind schedule, so I went with it.)

I hope to eventually transcribe the video and edit this post with that, but for now, I hope you can hear most of it.

The important things are: the Fuckatorium 2.0 is set up enough for me to feel comfortable in it, it's a big room, I have a mirrored wall which are hiding closets full of fun clothes and gear, I have a bookshelf full of sex toys, and I have my bed.

Oh, and I figured out how to show my feet close-up without straining myself (a big improvement over the setup from Fuckatorium 1.0).

Now that this is (mostly) done, I can already feel the energy returning to do all kinds of thing with my web site, my listings, my blog... Seriously, all of my productive energy has been focused on this for the past three days: getting this blog post up with a video and turning my cam listing back on, and yet, while the video was still compressing, ideas starting popping into my head.

Dear Galiana: Please relax and enjoy yourself tonight instead of bopping directly to the next thing without taking time to celebrate, you goofy dork. Love, Galiana

(footnote: my first caller of the evening was phone, not cam, but he was willing to indulge me feeling celebratory, so now I feel like I've had a toast with the best champagne to christen the place... thank you)

Happy happy me!

Presents!

Sometimes my callers want to give me gifts. Lately, I've gotten an unusually high amount of them.

Since I have a cam now, I made little videos of myself opening everything I've gotten in the past week. I figure it's good advertisement for my new cam listing too, right? I mean, just making a bunch of videos of myself isn't completely narcissistic, is it?

(Dear Inner Modest and Shy Girl: Please try to just keep your eyes closed more. All I can really offer you is denial. Sorry. Love, Galiana)

First: a thank you to the financial slave who bought me the camera, some Secrets In Lace lingerie, some amazing Carlos shoes, stuff to set up the Fuckatorium for cam, a new headset for cam calls, and some new hair / face stuff that I'm loving using. Here's me opening some of that (I didn't realize when I made it that Blogger would squish widescreen... sorry):

Then today, for Valentine's Day, I made 3 videos. The first was lingerie and pillowcases, and the chocolates my husband got me:

The second is 2 gifts I got in the mail, both of which make me feel good in different ways: the ItGetsBetter t-shirt, and a SpaFinder gift certificate.

And the last Valentine's Day gift-o-rama is a veritable boatload of stuff that will let me dress up and look a bit like a robot! I have a few fans in the technosexual / fembot fetish community who want me on video or cam. I'm still working on my movements, and not ready to demo those yet, but now I have clothes! /squee

I look happy in all these videos, and grateful, and both of things are true: I am both happy and grateful for them. And at the same time, I'm a tiny bit overwhelmed.

Remember at the end of A Streetcar Named Desire when Blanche tells the man who's coming to take her away that she has "always relied on the kindness of strangers"? I haven't. Not a bit. I've always relied on myself, always had a hard time asking for help, and always been stubbornly insistent on valuing *people* over *things*. I gave gifts much more freely and graciously than I accepted them.

And now I find myself in the position of completely relying on the kindness of strangers, and having to figure out how to be gracious about accepting things which will enhance my life, or help me grow my business. It's easiest if I can point to some way where "he'll get his money's worth out of this", but when someone gives me SpaFinder gift certificates so I can get a massage... well... there's not a lot there except for me to relax and enjoy myself, is there?

I'm working on it. I'm better. I'm down to only about 20% of the time now where I think "What the hell am I doing? What they hell are they doing? What the hell should I do when they wake up and regret this?!?" That's an improvement - at first it was more like 80%...

This is good for me. It's good for me to stretch and grow and learn how to do new things, like enjoy getting gifts without feeling guilty or indebted.

Thank you, gentlemen who have been getting me gifts. Thank you very much for the gifts, and thank you very much for helping me grow. /blowkiss

Hello Video World!

As soon as I got the camera running, I made a little "hello world" video so I could always remember how much I've learned along the way.

Sure enough, there were about a dozen things I'd love to fix: I forgot to say "hello world" first, the glare from the computer screen on my glasses, how I was positioned on the bed, I forgot to thank the person who bought me the camera (thank you slave!)...

But I can forgive myself because I'm soooooo excited! And because I'd rather have the honest first shot than muck with it.

And now... let's see how blogspot does with embedding video (wmv format, 28 seconds long):

So after I got the cam, I went shopping for some new beauty products for my face and hair, set up the room (the green thing behind the bed is new - I wrapped a 4'x8' piece of pegboard in batting and fabric - I wanted to use the bed more like a daybed, but I wanted a backdrop behind me that wasn't beige like the walls, so I wouldn't melt into the background), took a crazy long luxurious shower, did my "hello world" video, filmed a special "thank you" video for the slave who bought me the camera, and then got lost for a while in experimenting.

SO FUN.

I'm not going to be ready to open a cam listing until I have more experience making videos, but we're on the right track, heading the right direction! Yay!

Sybian Video & Masturbating Alone

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