Thoughts on Rates

I did not follow one of the best pieces of advice I ever got when I was first starting out: you're new, so you can afford to play with your rates, so keep raising them by $0.10/min every two weeks or so until you find your sweet spot.

Instead, after a month at $0.99/min ($0.55/min to me) to build feedback, I jumped to $1.49/min ($0.90/min to me). It was a smashing success. The 63% raise more than compensated for the callers who quit me. I felt justified at having bypassed the slow, painful rate creep.

Perhaps counter-intuitively, I lost many of my very short callers (under-10-minute average), fewer people insisted that I send them free minutes before they'd try me out, and I found more callers willing to talk for longer. It was fantastic. I was on cloud nine.

And then, a month after that, I disastrously tried to raise my rates again to $1.99/min ($1.25/min to me), at the same time as I was traveling, and also while setting up an invite-only VIP line that stayed at $1.49/min. I confused my callers, knocked my listings out of their top-page spots, and lost the momentum I had with people leaving me feedback. It was a horrible, terrible mess.

So I tucked my tail between my legs, salvaged the points I had made on my VIP line by switching it to an open line, rolled back all my prices to $1.49/min, and promised not to jack with my rates again for at least three months. That was 10 months ago, and the rates on Smart Fun Galiana haven't budged since then.

In the meantime, I created Ms Galiana and Hypno Galiana and toyed with their rates a bit, but I gave up on them when I realized I was unhappy with the way the listings were written. Unfortunately, that was also about the time we had to move, so they got lost in the shuffle for a while. But they're climbing back. They'll find their own ways in the world, I feel sure of it.

(pssst... I'll let you in on a secret: for a brief time, I also opened a purposefully mysterious listing with no pictures of my face, and I had a British accent and I charged $2.99/min. But when the few people who called that line insisted on knowing more about me personally, I hated the pressure of having to choose between lying to them or continuing to play bad cop and say no. Plus, it was nerve-wracking to switch personas like that in the space of 10 seconds as Madge told me which character was getting the call. But I'm not gonna lie, the British accent was super fun. Don't tell anybody, okay?)

My motivation for reconsidering my rates is that many callers have told me I am selling myself short because of my intelligence and creativity. I am acutely aware of my shortcomings, which makes me want to leave my rates low, but also aware that I may be leaving money on the table, which is silly.

Also, now that I am under a bit less financial pressure than I was, a few weeks of "oops well that didn't go as I'd hoped" is more acceptable now than it used to be. Don't get me wrong, the cash I'm making now is going toward non-luxuries like car insurance and vet bills, and my Amazon gift cards replenish my dog treats more often than they provide lipsticks or lingerie, but I am responsible for a smaller percentage of our overall spending.

Ugh, I need to take a break from explaining my financials for a while, and yet I keep feeling the need to do so. Here, this should help: We're nowhere near rich, we have too much debt, we have no savings yet (although we're working on it now), and I still need to work to pay some bills. There. I said it. Now then... Dear whatever part of me needed to keep explaining my finances: Please hush now, for at least a month, okay? Oooooookay.

Back to rates: I have set the rates on my Ms Galiana listings at $2.25/min ($1.44/min to me), which I expect to attract a few callers over time. And after I re-write my Hypno Galiana listings, those will be set at $1.95/min($1.23/min to me). Those rates reflect the relative expenditures of my energy to do those types of calls, in general. Obviously, some submissive calls are draining and some domme calls are refreshing, but in general, I expend more energy leading than I do following.

When Ms Galiana and/or Hypno Galiana take off enough for me to start feeling resentful of taking calls on Smart Fun Galiana, I will start raising those rates by $0.05 / minute every two or three weeks until it feels like the three accounts are balancing themselves out properly.

I will also be logging in to other sites to take calls, and starting those at a minimum of $2/min (announcements forthcoming soon about where else I am listed).

My uninformed guess is that it will take 3 months before I start raising Smart Fun Galiana rates, and I will end up with: Ms Galiana $2.25 - Hypno Galiana $1.95 - Smart Fun Galiana $1.75.

For the sake of gratitude and nostalgia, I will keep a wandering $1.49 line, and I'll keep the blog updated to let you know which one it is. The idea is: there will always be at least one listing where I could use more points or good feedback or a better ranking, so I can direct fiscally savvy blog readers to call me there for a lower rate, and everyone is theoretically happy.

Plus, let's be honest: if you're reading the blog, I like you better, and you deserve it.

So the first step in all this very-slow-moving process was to open Ms Galiana at $2.25/min. Done.

The second step is to raise the rate on my Smart Fun Galiana listings under the Mistresses and Femme Dommes categories. Also done.

The third step is to finish my Hypno Galiana re-write. Mmmmm.... not so much with the done on that yet. But at least I'm mulling it. That's a start, right?

Video: Paralegal Humiliation and Blackmail

You've been a bad boy, haven't you? First, you took credit for my work on the case, then you lied to me about your marital status, and last, but certainly not least, you are working with a seriously under-equipped little partner there in your pants, aren't you?

Tell you what, you just sit back and enjoy this video conference call where I do a strip tease for you on company time, and I'll make sure and save it with no audio so HR and the senior partners can get a good long look at it, if you don't give me what I'm demanding...

I was in quite a mood when I shot this video, thinking of a caller who is a lawyer (and I used to do litigation support, so the jargon is actually legit), who will likely be both horrified and fascinated by it. The humiliation includes legal incompetence as well as small penis humiliation. I think I had some leftover hostility from my old job!

I know there are more images in the gif than usually available for most clips that only run 6:22, but I had a ton of fun shooting it, and couldn't choose only a few looks.

I think I look kind of adorable in this one, if I do say so myself, but what I'm saying definitely shows that I'm not someone you want on your bad side!

It's available for $7 via NiteFlirt:

Unpredicted Responses

I have an idea what the response(s) will be when I post something on my blog, or when I rework my listings, but I'm almost never right.

I wrote about all my crazy limitations and crazy considerations with my crazy life situation if I were to think of Meeting In Person. I feared people would think I was crazy and be turned off. Instead, I got:

• three people told me how well-organized and well-written it was, complimenting me on my presentation of such a complicated subject
• one caller told me to plan on packing my bags this summer to visit him (I dunno if he was serious, but it was sweet)
• two callers told me that my approach was completely reasonable, and they would love to do that for me some day
• about ten people told me it was cool and reasonable, but they could never afford it (obviously I understand - I couldn't afford it either!)
• a bunch of people empathizing about my complex life situation (thanks!)
• one caller told me that he thought, "Either she's being real and honest and explaining a complicated situation, or this is the most brilliantly devised red herring ever written" which cracked me up - I don't have the energy to sustain those kinds of lies, but thanks for thinking that I'm that clever!
• and then, I have to admit, I had a favorite response: one caller had me use my vibrator on myself hard and fast, and listen to him at the same time, while he told me, "You said in your blog post that my boner would be at risk... Do you have any idea how fucking hard it made me to read the words 'sustained... vigorous... fucking...' and think about being with you?" I will never forget how good that call made me feel. 

Then I wrote about my six-hour phone call, and I expected people to be upset with me that I had cut them off at 60 minutes, and instead, I got:

• a woman who passed the story to her husband, who spent the next day at lunch with buddies discussing male orgasm denial: looking up cock cages on their phones, since none of them would admit to having heard of them before, and heatedly discussing the psychology of it - too funny.
• two requests for "light financial domination" by regulars who have never played with it before, but had been curious - too fun.
• three regulars tell me that they totally understood why I imposed time limits on them, because "I work you hard" as if they were proud of themselves (and they were all correct!) - too cute.

I wrote about my husband getting a job, which I didn't think would cause any response at all, and I got a new caller from a long-time blog reader who has extensive cuckolding fantasies, who had to call me to talk about how I'm going to be running around town, building a stable of daytime lovers while my husband is at work. Good idea...

So there's your meta post for the day, blogging about blogging, instead of actually blogging. Feel free to accuse me of slacking and come up with a suitable punishment!

Time Limits Vs The Six Hour Phone Call

In this post about time limits, I explained that some types of phone sex calls have the unfortunate tendency to accelerate my dizziness to the point where I have to draw a line and impose a time limit, especially calls where I do most of the talking, or where more than one orgasm per person is required.

Last night, I spent almost six hours with one caller, from 6:53 pm to 12:46 am. Because of the time he spent re-charging his account, and one unfortunate disconnect, it worked out to 346 minutes of billable time. Wow.

Now, if you would have asked me yesterday at 6:52, "What is your prediction for your stamina tonight? How long of a call could you take right now?" I would have guessed maybe 90 minutes. I never would have guessed 346. No way.

So how was 346 minutes possible?

A few factors caused the perfect conditions:
* I was well-rested
* He did most of the talking
* We were talking, not fucking


I was well-rested: He was my first call of the evening. I had enough sleep, I hadn't tried to do too many errands, and I had taken things at my own pace all day. It was a lovely day, in fact.

He did most of the talking: The way the conversation goes with this particular caller (nicknamed "The Wanker"): he shares his thoughts about wankers / losers / beta males, the psychology of sex, the insistent physiology of the cock, the emotional complexities of trading sexual energy for money, and the simultaneously pleasurable / tormenting activity of paying an attractive woman to talk with him about sex when he knows he won't actually be getting laid.

The words come tumbling out of his mouth. I almost have to interrupt him sometimes to interject with a thought. For every thing I say, he probably says five things. So I'm listening, paying attention, adding my perspective, and coming up with good questions, but if I need a mental break, I can take one and just let him go on auto-pilot for a minute or two. It's handy.

The difference between "I am almost always talking" and "I am almost always listening" is huge -- I can go way longer if my caller is doing most of the talking.

We were talking, not fucking: For almost the entire call, neither of us were heading toward an orgasm. He had just gotten his first-ever chastity cage over the weekend, and he'd been wearing it for about 52 hours when we started talking. When he hit 72 hours, it would be the longest he had ever gone in his life without masturbating to orgasm.

So the fascinating thing to him about the call was how much more aroused he could get without having to end the call because he had climaxed. So topics that normally would send him over the edge? Keep exploring those, and push hard, because he can't come.

Exploring the psychology of financial domination? Listening to graphic details about me and my lovers? Hearing about how a couple transitions from flirting to fucking? All of those were deliciously stimulating for him. And honestly, I got a huge rush of power and pleasure from hearing his breath catch in that way that usually means he's about to climax, but knowing that this time, I could keep on keeping on and just mess with his mind for all it was worth.

When I realized I was getting tired, finally, I dropped the double-bomb on him: would he be willing to pay me extra to masturbate while explicitly explaining to him what I was doing? He never could have done that without a chastity cage; he would have climaxed in five minutes. And the mind-fuck of asking him to pay extra for me to masturbate, knowing that it was included for other calls, was based on my knowledge of his hesitant interest in financial domination.

I made him come up with the dollar amount (which was a fairly vicious trick on my part, if I do say so myself), and then explained every detail of what I was doing and how it felt. It was a slow build, first with my fingers, then with my vibrator (which I called "the cock" to emphasize that he was not fucking me, but that I love being fucked).

When I came, hard, leaving me scrambled and breathless, he sounded like his brain had exploded instead of his balls. "There's just... there's no mistaking that sound, is there?" he finally managed to say, while I laughed at his obvious mind-melting level of frustrated arousal.

Dear Galiana, 
Remember how once upon a time, you thought you wouldn't be any good at financial domination, or humiliation, or tease and denial? You were wrong on all accounts. And just think: the world is still full of fun new things for you to learn that you love! All it takes is finding the right partner to do them with. Have fun!
Love, Galiana

Splitting Personalities: Hypno & Mistress Galiana

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The Dilemma of a Reluctant Financial Dominatrix

When I began doing phone sex almost 5 months ago, I had never heard of financial domination as a fetish. Heck, when I started, I had no domination listings whatsoever, but I kept getting requests to be dominant, and enjoyed the calls, so I made a listing.

And now I have people calling me who have a financial domination fetish. I'll be honest: I'm struggling to figure out how to provide it.

The core of the fetish is power and control: you feel that your power is in your money, that your control over your money is power for you. You believe that my power is in my (sex appeal / hypno mind control / whatever). You want to trade your power in exchange for the power I have.

It's not inherently different than wanting to be physically restrained. You have the power of motion. I take it from you. The surrender turns you on. As a restraint enthusiast, I completely understand. It's delicious to relax and trust like that.

The complication is that I genuinely want the best for people, and it's impossible for me to know where your line is between "spending hobby money on something I love" and "jeopardizing my financial well-being". I never want anyone to regret decisions they made with me. I never want someone to feel abused by me.

(Side note: Do I want someone to feel used by me? Yep, absolutely. I want scores of happy sore dicks and pussies and asses and mouths and hands with the memory of me wearing them out for my amusement and enjoyment. Bring it.)

It's a razor thin line for me between giving someone the pleasure they crave and feeling like an abuser. Yes, I want to pay my bills. And yes, I want to rebuild our savings (currently back to 1/4 of a month's expenses because we needed new tires - I ain't gittin filthy rich off this gig just yet). And yes, I love getting tributes and Amazon gift cards and items off my wish list.

But when someone tells me they want to be controlled, and used, and they want me to rape their wallet, I haven't figured out yet how to negotiate that the way I have with BDSM. Start with small amounts of tributes right then on the phone? Treat it as if it is as much of a fantasy as cuckolding and just describe slowly taking over their finances, but really expect nothing (my default so far)? Treat them as responsible adults and just take what I can get and quit worrying about it?

I've read too many stories of people who get themselves into trouble with financial domination. And sure, those stories exist with by-the-minute phone sex as well, but those boundaries are clearer for me. He is choosing to call, and he is choosing when to end the call. I never ask people to add more time unless they tell me they love being asked to reload (well, unless I'm this close to coming and sometimes I say "Oh God no please don't leave me" but I always feel bad about that). But with financial domination, I am asking for, or demanding, the money. It feels different.

An example with a recent hypno caller, and how I've worked it out:

His hypno fetish is not erotically based, it is control-based. He wants to know I have absolutely control over his mind and body, but I can't seem to get an erotic charge out of him when he's tranced (he says it's him, not me, but I still feel bad). His most powerfully fulfilling hypno memories are of being financially dominated, but he does not want to return to the place of having trouble paying bills (zoikes! no kidding).

Our compromise is that I "interrogated" him about his financial limits while he was under hypno, and for every question he answered, he owed me another $1 in tributes after the call (his idea). Now when he calls, we play the interrogation game for somewhere between $20 and $50, so his financial fetish is somewhat satisfied. And I use other methods to demonstrate the control I have over him (like post-hypnotic triggers to tickle him, which are awesomely fun and I love so much).

Another example: I negotiated with a fin dom client that if he has any money left at the end of the month after spending it on me, he had to give 1/2 of it to charity and give me the other half. I made him answer what the maximum amount was in a month, and it was an astonishing figure. So far, I haven't seen any of it except for phone calls. At the end of every month, I'm going to keep telling him to send me his money. But if he doesn't and he calls back, I'll take his calls and not mention it, just like I do with every other fantasy. After all, I don't hold cross-dressing sissies accountable if they've gone to the glory hole like we discussed last time.

I've had fin dom callers say it's a turn-off that I ask so many questions about their safety. I'm learning. I'm getting there. I'm a smart, creative problem solver, I can figure this out.

But still... suggestions are welcome.