Video(s): Pleasurebot Testing

A gentleman who has seen the Galiana Demo videos (first and second) requested a custom video of the testing done on a Galiana model pleasurebot android before she is shipped to her new owner.

Please note: this version of the Galiana model was ordered especially full-figured, and appears even curvier than earlier demonstration models.

We here at Advanced Smart Fun Robotics (ASFR) take our testing very seriously: we test extensively and thoroughly indeed, which resulted in 25:48 of video. Yep, that's over 25 minutes of fembot testing!

During most of the testing, the unit was naked, which is why we cannot show as many pictures as we normally would to showcase our videos. The one picture shown is from the "Strip Tease" section of testing, when the model was in demonstration human emulation mode. Stripping does, of course, requires clothing to be put ON before it can be taken OFF... although that might have caused a bit of confusion...

All four parts combined are $40 (they are $48 if you purchase them individually, so that is more than a 15% savings!). Link to buy the combination video: http://bit.ly/npzBa4

Each part is $12 if you purchase them separately.

The descriptions below of each part would be considered spoilers if you were considering these a work of fiction, so if you prefer to be surprised by the testing parameters and results, please stop reading now.

Part 1 (07:58): Boot Up, Test Basic Movement, Describe Model Specifications

The naked pleasurebot boots up, stating her manufacturer/series/model/serial number/programming, then begins testing basic movement. After walking, bending, etc have been confirmed to be functioning as expected, she describes the specifications ordered for her particular unit. Link to buy Part 1: http://bit.ly/nTAJ4Y

Part 2 (06:39): Describe Sexual Programming, including explicit close-ups

The naked pleasurebot switches to demonstration human emulation mode to describe in a chirpy, happy, straightforward way all the sexual positions available to someone interacting with a Galiana series fembot: oral, breasts, vaginal, and anal, with explicit closeups, but no penetration (unless you count fingers being stuck down a throat as penetration). Link to buy Part 2: http://bit.ly/o3jOLq

Part 3 (06:59): Testing Strip Tease and Erotic Dancing functionality

The naked pleasurebot tests erotic movement capabilities, including dancing and strip tease... but runs into some issues because stripping requires clothing to have been put on first. This is resolved, and the testing continues. Link to buy Part 3: http://bit.ly/ph6TNc

Part 4 (04:32): Testing Pleasure Processing with dildo, leading to malfunction-via-orgasm

The once-again-naked pleasurebot tests pleasure processing by using a dildo with her vaginal unit, initiating the orgasm sequence, a run of events which reveals a few calibration issues which clearly need to be resolved before the unit can be shipped. The Galiana unit's ending position is clearly not an indication of fembot health. Link to buy Part 4: http://bit.ly/r9R42d

No matter which part(s) you choose, you get both the large (1280 x 720) and small (320x240) resolutions. The format is WMV (please contact Ms Galiana Chance at ASFR Customer Service if you require a different format).

Remember: at ASFR, we have "The Best Human Emulation Mode in the Business!" and "Your Fun Comes First!"

Perfectionism, Insecurity, and Nakedness

This is why I don't do more videos and pictures: perfectionism and insecurity. Well, and the effort.

Logistics first: to get paid for spending an hour on the phone, I need to: (a) feel sexy (b) make sure my dogs are well enough taken care of that if I have to suddenly leave them alone for an hour, they won't starve or dehydrate or chew anything valuable (c) make sure at least one phone has been charged (d) log in (e) wait for an hour's worth of calls.

To get paid for making a video or a picture set or being on cam, I need to: (a) feel sexy (b) shower, do my hair, put on makeup, put on a sexy outfit (c) make sure the lighting and camera and room are set up correctly, including picking up the guts of any toy the dogs have recently shredded (d) try not to lose my sexy while cleaning (e) decide what to say/do (f) make sure dogs... same as above (g) shoot a take (h) watch the take, and about half the time, decide I need to re-shoot it (i) piece all the good takes together into a coherent video with open/close titles (j) upload the video (k) write a blog post / email to announce the creation of the video (l) absolutely die of insecurity until someone tells me it looks great.

In theory, it should take me about an hour to make a 15-minute video. In reality, because I haven't set up a smooth-running content machine yet, and my computer is slow to render, and I can't work on the computer too long at a time without nauseating myself, it takes me a whole day. At least.

Ideally, I'd shoot more than one video in a day, after all that prep, but again, the reality is, once I've done an hour or two of setup and then shot for an hour or two, I need a break, my makeup is getting smudgy, and my creativity is starting to run dry.

All this stems from a video I shot on Sunday, which in theory, I should have released yesterday, but as long as I'm being totally honest and whiny here... deep breath...

I've gained weight since I went on my medicines, and this was a custom video, and he wanted me naked, which I was fine with until about an hour after I shot it, and then all my Inner Cast, all at once, basically started yelling at me, "YOU'RE NAKED ALMOST ALL THE WAY THROUGH THIS ENTIRE VIDEO AND YOU LOOK FAT!"

I know, fuck those voices. I'm trying. I'm doing my best. I actually did just hit send to the person who ordered the custom video, so he has the link.

Now I need to break it up and post it for sale. It's 25 minutes, and it needs to be broken into either two or three shorter videos, because most clips are simply nowhere near that long, so the pricing expectations are geared for shorter videos, so I need to break them up, or else my brain will fucking explode from trying to figure out what to charge.

HOLY FUCKING SHIT, DID I MENTION I'M NAKED IN THIS VIDEO? Like, I have on NO CLOTHES AT ALL. None. Not even earrings. Just inordinate amounts of silver/grey makeup and some pretty awesome silver glittery nail polish.

The nails rock. I'll admit that much. Even though you can't see them for long in the video, they're fucking awesome. Here, I'll distract myself by taking a picture and sharing it with you (which, of course I took 3 times before I just gave up and decided this was good enough, even though my fingers look oddly disproportionate to me, because I'm so fucking neurotic):

I curse a lot when I'm trying to force my way through my insecurities into action. Fuck hell shit damn yeah I do. Oh, and cunt, for good measure.

Well, at least I can still crack myself up. Always. In fact, that is my favorite thing about myself: I can amuse myself endlessly.

Soooo. Back on topic. The poor guy who requested this custom video ... he asked for it almost two months ago, and I said I thought I'd get it to him in a week or two (that was the week before I started taking my new medicines, before everything went haywire for a while). The guy who asked for custom audio asked for it the week before that (I also recorded that on Sunday, two months overdue). Clearly, I have no business making estimates of any kind.

So, if you want a custom video from me, I would be happy to do it, as long as you don't mind waiting approximately forever, and you don't mind if I have a full-fledged insecurity attack before I send it to you. Especially if you want me naked.

Naked. Pudgy. Insecure. Did I mention I was naked? Deep, deep breaths, Galiana. Inhale. Exhale. You'll be fine...

What Do You Do For a Living?

Dear Other PSOs,

What do you say when someone in public innocuously asks what you do for a living? Like the bank guy seeing my direct deposit dribble in with small daily payments...

I usually break eye contact immediately, do a dismissive wave of my hand, become as distant and stiff and formal as I can muster, and say "I do personal consulting". Then I look back at them with one eyebrow slightly arched and no hint of a smile on my face. Nobody has ever asked for clarification.

I understand fully: that response could just be drawing attention to myself. Thankfully, since I report all my revenue and gifts on my taxes, and I'm not breaking any laws, I have nothing to hide if someone chooses to snoop. I mostly just think it's funny to go all alpha bitch suddenly with no warning and watch the response.

Tease and Long-Term Denial

I have a caller who has gotten me interested in a concept with many facets and many names: one piece is male chastity / male orgasm denial / tease and denial; a second piece is sack tapping / ball torture; a third piece is small penis humiliation.

Whew. It's a lot to take in.

Thankfully, he's a patient teacher. In fact, our conversations would frequently seem theoretical to an outsider: we would seem like two people rationally and calmly discussing the merits of a man not having an orgasm for days on end... weeks on end... months on end... maybe never. And how testicles feel when stretched or pulled or flicked or punched when they are full. And how some women feel that men with less than 7" of cock don't deserve to have full-release orgasms because they are physiologically unequipped to deliver the most satisfying kinds of orgasms to their women.

(Note: that's fantasy talk about a small penis: I've had ridiculous orgasms on tongues and fingers, and many women are incapable of having orgasms merely from penetration, no matter what the size. The reality is: if you want to make me come until I'm a quivering mess begging to be allowed to go to sleep, you can, even if your cock is tiny, doesn't get hard, or is missing altogether. I know there really are size queens who truly disagree, but I ain't one of them.)

Underneath that calm conversation, however, we both know that we are both deliciously turned on by the reality: he will get himself too aroused to hide it anymore, and then he will start begging to be allowed to release. And there, in that moment, for him, according to the rules of the game we play, the answer will always be no.

I owe a huge debt of thanks for the practically educational Male Chastity Blog, by Sarah, a married woman who calls the blog "Adventures of a liberated woman and her male chastity husband". Her well-written, well-reasoned blog posts, newsletters, and her book are all well worth your time if you're interested in a realistic, yet passionate, view into the lifestyle of male orgasm denial.

As Sarah recommended, we discussed the ground rules of our game first, and refined them along the way. The way we currently play is that he has to tell me, calmly and rationally, that he wants to be allowed to have an orgasm within the first 15 minutes of our phone call. Once we are in minute 16 with no agreement that he will climax that night, no matter what happens from them on, I will not allow him to climax.

And if he is allowed to have an orgasm, it will be a ruined orgasm / interrupted orgasm. He doesn't get a fully satisfying, squirting release unless we also negotiate some amount of money to change hands. So far, it's never been allowed. It's been over four months since his last full-release orgasm.

That's the dry version of our rules. The reality is blazingly more sexy once it gets going. Once he starts being irrational and I know he's getting turned on, I let myself start getting turned on... I'll even start masturbating a bit. I can hear his voice catch, his ability to find words fly out the window, and his frustration start to rise. When he starts calling me an evil bitch, I know he's dying to come.

I used to be such a sweet, nice, accommodating girl... who would have thought that after less than a year of phone sex, the thing that would tip me over the edge into a delicious, rippling orgasm would be hearing the ragged voice of a normally excruciatingly rational man begging, "Please, let me come," and my own answer, laughing at him, of, "You'll never come again." I would not have suspected how aroused that would make me.

After I climax, when he's still out of his mind with raging hormones, I tell him how good it feels to have that release, how satisfied I feel, how delicious it was. He usually tells me to go fuck myself, clarified with "I don't mean that as a negative"...

But he doesn't come. And he keeps calling back for more.

That's what lets me know that Sarah is right: he wants release, but he craves denial. Why? I dunno. I really don't get it at all. I don't understand what he gets from it. But I know it's working for both of us.

At this point, it's been 14 weeks and 2 days since he had his last ruined orgasm, and we don't have a date in mind for his next one. I feel a bit like a vampire, feeding off his sexual energy, fueling his flames, to get his heart pumping, so I can taste him, just a bit richer each time. Mmmmm. Deeeeeelicious.

Video: Galiana-bot Monitoring Fembots and Changing Clothes

I shot this custom video back in April, and it has been available on my "Stuff to Buy" page for a while, but I never announced it, silly me.

Watch the trailer!

This video was made from a custom script. In the first half, I am monitoring other fembots and reporting on their progress (so the first 9-ish minutes are close up of my face talking in emotionless mode).

In the second half, I receive new orders to prep for a multi-fembot orgy, so I peel off my jacket and blouse and skirt, revealing a lacy black bra and panties and garter belt and stockings, and then I put on a silver newsboy hat and some silver gloves, and practice my greetings to get ready for the party!

running time: 18:19
resolution: large (1440 x 1080) and small (320x240) are both included
format: WMV (please contact me directly if you require a different format)
price: $15

New Cam Red Bra

In May, I got a lovely gift from a caller of a new camera, and we spent the evening taking low light test pictures in my Fuckatorium. I would send them to him, along with a description of which cam setting I used, and we decided on the optimum settings after it was all said and done.

I was wearing a red bra for all the pictures, and a red thong for about half of them (the other half I'm naked from the bra down). Most of them are from the back, because that is clearly his favorite view of me. /blush

The flash got overzealous in some:

Flash Washed Out

In others, there wasn't enough light at all:

Too Dark

This one was our second-favorite setting:

Runner Up

But the winner of the best resolution, detail, and actually my favorite picture of the night was like this:

The Winner

 That version of me looks like a hell of a lot of fun. I'd hit it.

There are 41 pictures in the set, all of which are at least 1024 pixels high or wide, some are larger.

Just $10 via Niteflirt:

Sugar Daddy Musings

In theory, developing an in-person relationship with a new lover with Sugar Daddy energy would be perfect for me. My husband and I are openly non-monogamous, he often travels for work, and I have bills to pay and love to share.

So earlier this week, I found a few "dating" sites specifically designed for Sugar Daddies/Mommas to find Sugar Babies (also of both sexes - hooray for GLBTQ progress) and signed up for the two with the most interesting combination of features.

After a brief flurry of activity, this letter arrived in my brain: 

Dear Galiana in 2011,

Remember when you developed a fantastic long-distance BDSM relationship with a Dom over about six months, met him in person, it was awesome, then tried to quickly replicate it via an online kink site, and it ended in disappointment?

Remember when you developed a fantastic long-distance flirting relationship with a bi girl / straight guy couple over about six months, met them in person, it was awesome, then tried to quickly replicate it via an online swingers site, and it ended in disappointment?

So even though rumor has it that you might or might not have recently developed a fantastic long-distance lover relationship with a gentleman with Sugar Daddy tendencies over about six months of having phone sex with him, met him in person, and it was awesome, perhaps you have already learned the lesson that you cannot replicate such relationships quickly via online sites.

Do us a favor and skip the disappointment.

Love, Galiana from 2003

Don't get me wrong: I have had success in developing relationships with lovers from online sites. But it takes time, and energy, and patience, and the emotional fortitude to keep up your hope and hold fast to your standards. Add in my bizarre circumstances (I'm married, I'm a phone sex worker, I have vertigo...), and it starts to feel ... well ... it feels like a job.

And you know what? I have a job already, thank you very much. A job I love. Honestly, Galiana, the last thing you need is to be distracting yourself by having to politely turn away dozens of men who can't read or write complete sentences. If I wanted to do that, I would answer my email on my OK Cupid profile, which states I'm not looking, but I still get email (I set it up to be see callers' profiles to help them with their listings - I'm a damn fine profile coach if I do say so myself).

But just like with other dating / hookup sites, the majority of people on the Sugar Daddy sites are of average intelligence. It makes sense mathematically - the majority is average - that's not cruel, that's just the math (well, it might be the mean... heh, nerd joke).

I will not be a good long-term match with someone of average intelligence. So in order to find a good match, I need to take the time to sift through the majority to uncover the gold, which is less than 1% by volume. Hmmm, in that metaphor, the majority is dirt, and I'm not comfortable with that, because all people have value, but I can't quickly think of a better metaphor at the moment. But just to be clear: nobody is dirt, even if I don't happen to want to fuck them. 

I'm picky. I know. I need a someone who is smart, funny, honest, free of STDs, willing to use condoms, committed to usually doing the right thing (however it's defined for him), understanding of my circumstances, patient with my limits, has Sugar Daddy tendencies, and is filled head to toe with insatiable lust for me. Quite a combo.

Also, frankly, the whole dynamic still freaks me out, because it feels like I would be whoring myself out if I evaluated a potential partner based on how much of a girlfriend allowance he could give me. I mean, it would be whoring myself out. That's clear to me. And it doesn't fit me right, like a new shoe with a pointed toe in the wrong shape: it pinches me, and I want to take it off and walk around in my hippie free love bare feet again.

Maybe I'll return to the idea some time when I feel like I have an extra hour or two per day to sift. That day is clearly not today, because this afternoon, I'm going to the airport to pick up my smart, funny, honest, STD-free, do-the-right-thing, compassionate, patient, generous, lusty husband, and that makes me the luckiest girl in the world already.

See ya tomorrow :)